alright. today started out with dad waking me up from my deep sleep. man was i really tired. i think I couldn't get out of bed man. yeah anyways, I was seriously on fire today man. not literal, if not I'd be dead by now man. I felt like I was suffering from fever or something man. internally on fire. HOO! anyways, ate at newton hawker centre. after that mum went for cooking lesson. went down to sim lim square to have a nice walk around to look for my NEW hard disk casing. because the old one kinda spoilt -.-. well. this is bad. I've sinned again. God please don't kill me =( haha. placed bets on hamburg, liverpool and woodlands wellington =D so far won from hamburg and woodlands wellington. w00t. praise the lord! =D -crosses fingers liverpool will win to complete hat trick- anyways, after that picked mum up and went down to borders. saw this book i really liked. the afghan campaign by steven pressfield. most would probably think it's some book about USA bombing the shit out of Osama and his Talebans(old school man). anyways the book is about a Macedon soldier during his campaign with Alexander the Great in his campaign to conquer the middle east. since most stories are always in the perspective of the great one. it's a nice change to see a different perspective in the form of their followers. because without such people, nobody would ever be great. my next aim shall be the iliad and the odyssey. GOOD STUFF.

anyways went to meet darren to go to church. well. i must say we really looked like brothers with our long sleeves even though we wore different designs. i wonder how it'll be like if we wore the same design that we bought together. lol! sang for the church service with the choir that was meant for R-AGE awareness. well it's fun but i think i was literally looking at the screen all the time for the lyrics. lol. and one of the people told us the way we praise the lord with our hands raised is like an eye sore. well screw it. haha. well was suppose to have dinner with darren. but ps-ed him to eat with parents. sorry lah brother. lol. i guess that's about it for today? =) is that enough for you joyce tan? or do you want more detailed analysis of what i did today? =x

well I've been thinking alot. sometimes we do the things we don't wish to do. but why do we still do it even though it's not something we wish to do. it's so hard not to sin without having to sin in order to achieve something for the better good of everyone else. such irony to our life that we should be advocating the peace and love of life rather than the politics that is driving our life in many areas. how I wish life could be more understanding. but somehow, the beauty of life is what games we play in order to achieve something more, something great. to surpass. like Achilles and Alexander. "To be the best and above the rest". lastly I would like to leave with this message to you even though I know you may not read this. I still pray that each day God will bless you with strength, a clear mind and wisdom to complete your important year and achieve good results for your future and I still pray that you'd be safe and happy and blessed in every way possible that God can give to you. how I wish I could, but things have come to pass that I'm only living in a mere dream of the cruel fate that played on us.

been listening to Rie Fu's Life Is Like A Boat. it's rather applicable to my life now I guess. life is like boat, because the waves takes us to where we don't know. which is beautiful because we get to see new horizons with each passing day. but we don't know if the waves will act in our favour or against us. I would like to leave with you a simple question.

Have you ever wondered why do we do the things we do not wish to do and know that we will never do them, but we still do it when something or someone comes to change that fact?